The #1 Cracked Gist

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What is the Cracked Gist?

The focus of each Cheat Sheet is called The Gist. Think of the concise humor of the Craptions section crossed with our Pop Culture articles. Your goal here is to summarize everything anyone needs to know about the subject of your cheat sheet in one hilarious paragraph (500 character limit).

A few things to keep in mind:

  1. Don’t feel the need to rip every movie that you write a gist for. It’s perfectly fine to have a positive, passionate opinion about a film. OR: You don't have to love the movie, but you don't have to hate it either. Being negative does not mean you are being funny. We are never dismissive in our pop-culture articles.
  2. Focus on contributing to movies you have seen, and thought about.
  3. Avoid using the first joke that pops into your head. We're not looking for you to summarize the jokes other people would make. We're looking for you to make interesting and unique observations about the subject you're summarizing.
  4. Try to keep swearing to a minimum. Sometimes, well-placed profanity can help a joke land. Most of the time, a swear word makes your joke feel forced.
  5. There's no one correct way to write a Gist. If you can summarize everything we need to know about the movie in 10 words, that can be funny. It can also come off as glib. If you're having a tough time figuring out how to strike that balance, go to the movie section of Cracked, and study up.

Here are some samples that should give you a good idea of the wide variety of Gists that can work:
The Dark Knight
Independence Day

  • +6

Happy couple Cliff and Cydney plan to spend their blissful honeymoon in Hawaii. There, they meet titanium-skulled ex-SEAL Nick and his girlfriend Gina, who hunt goats with bows and reveal way too much information about their collection of knives. Because the knife talk isn't nearly creepy enough, news reaches the quartet about a serial killer on the island, who may or may not be on the trail with them. Did we mention the bags full of teeth? There are bags full of teeth too.

robertvaux
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Movie Clips from: A Perfect Getaway

A Perfect Getaway (2009)

Source: TMBDb.org

Information Not Available

Consensus: While smarter than the average slasher film, A Perfect Getaway eventually devolves into a standard, predictable, excessively violent thriller.

Overview
  • Rating:
    R (USA)
  • Theatrical Release:
    August 06, 2009
  • Budget:
    Not Available
  • Box Office:
    Not Available
  • Runtime:
    1 hrs 37 min
  • Produced by:
    Mark Canton Ryan Kavanaugh Ryan Kavanaugh Tucker Tooley
  • Screenplay by:
    David Twohy
Director
David Twohy
Cast
Marley Shelton Cleo
Timothy Olyphant Nick
Kiele Sanchez Gina
Milla Jovovich Cydney
Steve Zahn Cliff
Freebase CC-BY
Source: A Perfect Getaway on Freebase, licensed under CC-BY
Cracked Gists
500 characters left
  1. Happy couple Cliff and Cydney plan to spend their blissful honeymoon in Hawaii. There, they meet titanium-skulled ex-SEAL Nick and his girlfriend Gina, who hunt goats with bows and reveal way too much information about their collection of knives. Because the knife talk isn't nearly creepy enough, news reaches the quartet about a serial killer on the island, who may or may not be on the trail with them. Did we mention the bags full of teeth? There are bags full of teeth too.

    robertvaux
    • +6
  2. This Newlywed Couple spend their honeymoon in Hawaii. Eventually meeting up with an ex navy seal and his hot Girlfriend. Word gets out about some killers, and the whole time your made to believe its the Ex Navy Seal and His Extremely Hot Girlfriend. Only to be later pissed on and flipped off with shocking News.

    DavidTroi
    • +2

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Hereafter

Released: September 12, 2010

Box Office: $32,741,596

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